Rainy Day Musings

Growing up in West Texas as a farm girl I learned to appreciate the rain. We needed it, depended on it, and very often prayed for it to come.

In Pennsylvania I learned to tolerate it, expect it, and even feel thankful when it didn't make it's regular appearances.

When we moved to Pennsylvania we experienced an unusually warm, dry summer. Now that we have moved back to Texas we have had an unusually mild, wet spring. It's funny though how those things that you grow up learning and understanding never really leave you. My love and deep appreciation for rain and thunderstorms grew dormant in the wet hills of Pennsylvania. But now that I am back in West/North Texas, that love is alive and thriving again.

Today is a rainy, thunder struck day. The sum rose this morning but was soon engulfed by the deep blue clouds that came sailing in from the North. A Norther. Those storms that come in from the north are usaully trouble because they bring colder air and it's usually pretty hot here by this time of the year and that usually brews up one heck of a storm. But the milder temps kept this storm from being a record breaker. The heavy rain and menacing clouds have passed on now and we are left with the steady rain and comforting thunder of a good ole Texas style storm.

I am not sure why but today, turning all the lights on in the house at 8:30 made everything feel cozier. In Pennsylvania it was just normal. And today, for me, that cozy breeds a contemplative spirit. These days should be special. They were for my family growing up. If it was summer time it meant everyone took the day off and stayed in doors. EVEN Dad. This was a special treat for us because it meant something speacial would happen. Days that Daddy stayed home were like holidays. We made yummy treats to eat, dusted off the board games and sat on the living room floor together. At least until Dad fell asleep. Then we would all pull out a good book and just bask in the warmth of home.

As a kid, I cherished those days. One time while Angie and I were still in school a big storm came and we got several inches of rain. We lived on about 3 miles of dirt road and Dad let us stay home that day from school. We were redecorating the living room and we all spent the day painting. Even working together was fun when Dad was there.

Home for my family was a refuge. A place we went to rest and relax, to eat, and be together. Home is so much more than that though. My home was no different. My mom did such a great job of making our home a peaceful place that we wanted to be. She kept it so inviting and my home was always filled with love.

As a Mom myself, I am so thankful for the home I grew up in. It is not an easy task to make your home peaceful and warm and inviting. Especially if I can not keep that kind of spirit for myself.

I am not talking about having a spotless kitchen or squeaky clean bathrooms. That's nice, but that is not what makes a home warm or inviting. To make a home your family's haven, well...you have to have that peace in your heart. I have caught myself not wanting to be at home. I just want to be somewhere else. I mean, good grief, I spend somedays where I don't always even make it out the front door!! But that is NOT the attitude I hope to foster in my children. I want our home to be a place that our children want to be. A place where they want their friends to come visit and are content to just BE. A safe place that they know they will be accepted and loved no matter what their faults are, no matter how badly they mess up, no matter how long they stay away. A place where they learn about who God wants them to be and who God is. A place where the distractions and fast pace of this world just melt away.

That takes work. It doesn't just happen. I have grown to realize this and appreciate my mother so much more for her willingness to take on this formidable task. She made my childhood home so peaceful and warm and wonderful. I still feel that when I go home and visit.

But as a mom I realize how much work that truly takes. You have to diligently gaurd against those distractions that so easily emplant themselves into our everyday lives. Things that are harmless enough but wedge their way into our families and take the place of these dreams we have so carefully crafted in our hearts of what home should be. There are too many to even name. But be on the look out. Scripture says that Satan is like a roaring lion, looking for who he may devour. And very often that lion of sin comes sneaking up behind you and you never even see him coming. That's why you have to be on a constant look out for the safety of your home. Diligently, you must keep your eyes wide open with every opportunity that arises to entertain your family, to keep them busy, or simply occupied.

Nothing has made me more aware of my selfishness than being a mom. Some days I find myself fuming over the fact that I have spent a whole day caring for ALL the needs of others that I haven't even had time to think about myself. But frankly, those days are easier than the days that I do have time to think about what I would like to be doing. On the days I give in to the temptation to think of myself are usually the days that I spend justifying my time and putting off the things that I know will have an eternal impact but just don't show any rewards right now.

Today, the rainy weather gave me a renewed vision for my role as homemaker; A deeper desire to make this house the home that I want our children and my dear husband to rush home to; A passion to be the grace filled mother that God has called me to be and knows I can be.