I'm Still Holding My Breath....

But I think my sweet baby boy may have mastered this whole sleeping thing!! Mimi and PopPop and Aunt Judy got a taste of the chaos that was naptime and it might not have worn them out but it sure did wear me out! It was nice having four more adults around to deal with the issue and comfort the cranky boy.

After Dan's days at home he understood why I was still so frazzled. A baby that cries all day in a very unpredictable pattern is so very wearing on your nerves. I was a mess! But, this week we have made a blissful break through. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and hopefully today, we have made it through morning nap and afternoon nap undisturbed!! I can handle the other naps being shaky as long as I get a little bit of time that I can count on quiet. Sweet undisturbed, calm, tranquil, QUIET!! You don't miss it until it's gone and it has been gone for almost 4 months now. It is time that we have a healthy, regular dose of quiet. It makes THIS mommy more peaceful and easy to deal with. I am still a little back logged so don't expect me to be patient. But I am definitely more sane! Not to mention a sweeter and smileyer little man!

Today he was fussing every time I walked out of his line of vision. As soon as I returned he started to coo and smile. It was almost like he was showing off for me. I felt wooed. But he must not know that he already has my heart and I fall all to pieces every time he smiles!

The Christmas Rush!

Well, it's here. The good times and all the stress it can bring!

Mimi and PopPop and Aunt Judy helped alleviate some of that stress while they were here. They took the girls out shopping for gifts for each other. It was a great idea I had not thought of before. Each child had a budget and they had so much fun finding gifts for each other. Then they came home and wrapped them up right away. I hope this can be a tradition. I also read somewhere about a Mom who started Mom's Store. She would collect small gifts throughout the year for each child and then set up shop for all the kids. She would change the gifts for each child and they would pay for them with their money just like at any store. The great thing is you get to decide the price, the gifts and the kids still get to have some autonomy in gift giving.


SO this year we got our decorations up quickly because the girls were itching to get their gifts under the tree. Since we had help this last week we decided to try and get all our Christmas shopping done. I am officially D-O-N-E!

We are continually blessed by our Lord, the Provider. We received a Christmas bonus from the church this year. PRAISE THE LORD!! It was totally unexpected and so much appreciated. I was determined to make it work and then God just laid a blessing in our laps! So, I wanted to be diligent to use the money wisely and not use all of it. We talked and decided exaclty what to spend, we set a price limit for each person and stuck to it! Because of the bonus we decided we could make gifts for our Youth workers and Volunteers. The girls and I are going to do LOTS of baking this Christmas. I guess for the amount of gifts we are giving we did it pretty frugally but darn if I didn't spend almost all of that money!

Besides the small gifts for the youth workers we spent less on our gifts than ever before. Perhaps it's because I added it all up so I could see exactly how much I spent but I was discouraged. Dan and I love to give gifts. We find such joy in it. I guess I need to do some more work on how to do it even more frugally.

I guess the real issue is money. The more I try to be a good steward of our money the more tight fisted I become. I hate that! IT'S NOT MY MONEY ANYWAY! How do I balance frugality without squishing out the attitude of giving? It's a struggle for me. The more we budget the more I stress about the money. I am sure that it will get easier. Some parts are freeing for me. I can budget things in and not worry if I am being irresponsible. But at the same time, there is no way to budget everything and when something comes up I panic or get stressed and worry about how to make it work with my precious budget. I know it is worth it.....I am by no means giving up. But I see an attitude emerging that I am not pleased with. The more I think about the money we are given, the more I make it my own. The harder it is to let go.

Every time I turn up the heater I see dollar signs flying away from me. Why am I struggling with this now? Dan and I have always been blessed with what we need when we need it. We have always given freely and found such joy in it. It is time for me to do a deep heart examination! What happened to me? What changed?

All that said, we are still giving freely this Christmas. We are trying to focus more on Christ so our gifts are not the focus. But giving is a BIG part of how we want our children to remember this holiday. I want them to know that it IS more blessed to give than to receive. We are moving one step closer to that this year and hopefully my struggle with frugality will not become their struggle as well. Most gifts take a little bit of money, even gifts that you make. I wish that I could take my eyes off of how much is being spent and enjoy the fact that we are able to give at all!

Somewhere I got the idea that it was important for us to get ahead. Not just financially, but in other ways as well. Saving money and using it responsibly became my way of getting ahead. Instead of blessing God by using my money wisely I got focused on the money. Money is only the means to the end and I am so sick of having the wrong focus.

I would rather spend every cent we have every month and allow our children to grow up in a family that focuses on others rather than have tons of money saved away and grow children that think the dollar amount in the bank is what brings happiness.

But don't worry......I am still going to try and teach them how to make sure that there is some waiting in the bank. I just forgot for a moment that the purpose of budgeting isn't to have more. It is simply to be more responsible with what you have, whether it's a little or a lot. Some of us just have to be a little more creative in how we give to others. I can handle that. As long as I don't stop wanting to give to others.

I pray that in the HURRY, HURRY, rush of Christmas time, and all the joy and stress that it can bring that you will take time to actually enjoy all the things that we decide are so imporant to fit in. And if for some reason you find yourself begrudging the gifts you have to give; office parties, church parties, school parties, school friends, teachers, Sunday School teachers, well, then just don't! No one said you HAVE to give gifts. If you want to and can, do but don't give yourself an ulcer trying to do what you think is expected. It probably isn't. A simple homemade card or heartfelt note of thanks might mean more than that box of candy anyway!

Let's try and keep this Christmas a MERRY one!

Happy Thanksgiving! 2007

Pre-Turkey dancing with PopPop















Preparations with Aunt Judy
















The feast














Story time with Big Sis











Babies in the hood- chillin'












Hope you all enjoyed your Thanksgiving and special time with family and friends!

Kids

Does this not just make your heart melt?
Well, I am obviously biased, being their mother and all. We just had a fun little picture shoot this morning. With the time change no one sleeps as late and we had a little extra time to have some fun.
FaithLyn is such a good big sister. I hope these three always value each others company like they do now. My little stair steps!



I caught a happy moment with Judson.





And then it was over.









This morning I went in to get him from a nap and he was just waiting for me contently. Those moments are rare! I went over and peered down at him smiling and he broke out in the biggest grin. We just cooed and smiled at each other for a while. Until I tried his patience too long and he got mad.
These moments are more common these days and I find that I cherish them more because of the days and days of fussy, sad, little Judson. If I stay home all day and everything goes just right he sleeps really well. So, most of the time he is sleeping great. When he is sleeping great he is a sweet, happy little boy. I guess he got that from me. Not the sweet, happy little boy part, the cranky when you don't get enough sleep part. I have been a tad bit more sane and even a bit happy these past few days.
Tonight I was putting Judson and Olivia to bed, they share a room. We were singing our goodnight song, Olivia has just started to sing with me; so cute! Then I turned the lights out and Olivia said her prayer and I prayed for them and then Judson started crying. So I leaned over him and started to sing pretty loudly to drown out the cries and he settled down and started to coo. It was like he was singing with me. He listened and watched until I stopped and then fussed a moment or two more. It is so nice to feel like he knows me now. I am not just the milk bar anymore. I am officially, Mama. He smiles when he sees me in the morning. I can calm him when he is restless and fussy. He knows me. He needs me. And even though I can't make it 5 minutes through any day with out being needed by 5 various people, it is nice to know that this little person doesn't just NEED me, he prefers me. Moments like that make all the other, "Tie my shoes, I need toilet paper, MOMMY!, She hit me, Why can't I have peanut butter and jelly", moments a little bit less taxing.

Happy Birthday, Aunt Patty!

I am blessed to share the same birthday as my sweet Aunt Patty. I tell you, I married into the greatest family! Not many girls can boast of that but I mean it wholeheartedly!

Hope you had a fabulous birthday as well! One of these days we need to celebrate together!
We sure do miss you!



Happy Birthday,

AUNT PATTY!!!

Visitors and My Last Year as a 20 Something.

What a great visit we had with Uncle David, Aunt Ellen and Cousin Seth! If you check out her post you can hear about the eventful trip home. I hope it won't deter them from visiting again.

The girls had a great time breaking Seth in to the world of big sisters. They tried very hard to take good care of him. He is such a sweet and easy going little guy! I mean we had 5 kids 5 and under in this house. We even managed to all get ready for church and make it there on time! But it was a group effort.

This was our first time to see David and Ellen in action as parents and it warmed my heart. They are everything and more than I ever imagined as parents.
Aunt Ellen is well known in our house for the Bear Hunt song. We did it several times and had a great time. We were REALLY into it! Maybe not the best way to calm down for bed but it was totally worth the memories we made.
Uncle David and Aunt Ellen are SOOO much fun!








Today was quite a day for me as well. My birthday celebrations started yesterday. We practice a birthday week in November. It always happens to fall the very week of my birthday......very convenient! ;)
My ladies bible study group suprised me with a cake yesterday. They blew me away with a gift certificate to a Spa! Then one of the dear ladies offered to babysit while I went! I was so overwhelmed, then I was just on a sugar high. Not really used to cake at 9 in the morning!

When I signed up for this study I picked the day time study as apposed to the night time study thinking all the other moms would be there. I was wrong. But I have been so blessed with this opportunity to get to know some of the older women of our church that I would not have otherwise had the opportunity to spend time with. They have blessed me with their love and acceptance.

I have been reading the Little House on the Prairie series to the girls and Dan got me the first season on DVD! We watched the first 4 or 5 episodes today. I cried in at least 3 of the 5!
My mother-in-love suprised me with a cake. Last year she was here to make me a cake, this year she ordered me one from the local bakery. What a treat! The roses were delivered this morning! (From Dan)


This afternoon at nap time I grabbed Olivia and we cuddled on the couch for a few minutes before Dan wisked her off to bed. In this picture we were saying, "Double Trouble!" This was right after we had been tickling her and she screamed, "That kickles!!"


Oh, and today while we were watching LHOTP, Pa picked up his fiddle after the girls had all gone to bed and he started to play. Then they moved the camera to a close up of the lamp. You could see the fire flickering. Elise was watching so intently and then she said, "Look, his music makes the fire dance." WOW! That floored me. I didn't even know what to say so I didn't say anything and she said, "Momma, look, his music is making the fire dance." I just grabbed her up in my lap and held her close. Isn't it amazing the things that kids can see!?

Everything about today was somewhat magical. And I am not just talking about how it was my birthday. Maybe that had something to do with it. Because it was my birthday I paid closer attention or something, but today was one of those days I would love to live over and over again. There were so many sweet memories. Like this morning when I heard the pitter patter of little feet as FaithLyn came straight to my room to tell me Happy Birthday first thing.

Then later tonight getting to have dinner with just Dan. We got talk. I realized how much I had to say. It was a good dinner. After that we went to a movie. Dan in Real Life. GREAT movie. I laughed so HARD. I think the other people in the movie theater were actually laughing at me rather than the movie. Then I cried. Hard. It was such a great movie. It had it all, laughs, drama, great music, a romance......what more could you ask for?

We came home to a quiet house, the kids were sleeping, the dishes were done..........free babysitters! My cup runneth over!

Rainy Day Tag

I was tagged by Gerlthouse to share what we do on rainy days. I want really badly to tell you all that we do something really special and meaningful....but we don't. It rained so much this past year that our house is sinking! Well just the bricks really. Let's see what are some of the things that we have done during the monsoon season. I can't think of anything that we do everytime. We usually watch a little more TV than normal. Sometimes we will pull out a game or read lots of books. Those are usually the days we might make cookies or something sweet to eat. I try to make them special somehow but rainy days always seem to become laundry days. We all sit in front of the TV together and I fold mountains of laundry. My kids like those days and I justify it because I am getting something done in close proximity to my children so I can monitor what they are watching. It eases my conscience anyway.

Personally, I am just making it through life right now. Just making it through a day, rainy or not, is a reason to rejoice in our house. I am focused on the big memories like holidays. That, I can tackle. We are also trying to figure out how to incorporate family worship into our schedule and what we want it to look like.

The girls always ask to do crafts or play with play dough. But the crafts take planning and clean up and the play dough takes monitoring and clean up. Those things I just don't have much energy for right now. Someday soon, but not yet.

But I would love to hear what you do! Someday I will be sleeping at night and I might even be able to get a nap every once in a while so I might need some back up ideas!
So, FordeFam, Shannon, and Ellen, I would love to hear how you do things!

I just found a tree like our blessing tree on the family fun website. They call it the thankful tree. I guess I am not as creative as I thought. Oh well. Some people come up with ideas and others make them happen, right? Did you see how I spinned that to make myself feel better? But the blessing tree was new to us! Happy November!!

The Kitten Litter

Here are all the kitty cats. I only made Judson wear a bib. But next year!! We had lots of fun last night at our church Trunk & Treat.

FaithLyn had her first preschool party and boy was she pumped! We got to all go and be there to see her sing the songs they had learned. Very cute and so interesting to see how she interacts with the world when we are not there all the time. She is such a sweet girl.

But in this picture she is a fierce cat! Don't get too close or you will find out just how sharp her kitty claws are!

Isn't this little guy growing so fast!? I am sure that if I mention this here it will stop but for the last three nights Jud the Stud has been sleeping through the night!!!! He is even sleeping through at least 2 naps, usually both morning, and sometimes the afternoon nap! I am not sure if I should begin to hope that we are finding some kind of normal or not. But I will definitely take what I can get and be ever so grateful!

Studley has some pretty sweet big sisters. I hope he appreciates how much they love him. FaithLyn begged us to take a picture of them all resting together for a moment while mommy got the fan going for nap time. Pretty sweet.